Living Out Loud with Darian

Guys I just wanted to share with you an e-mail that I received from a reader named Greta from Brooklyn, New York yesterday in response to my post "Get Back Up Again". She is a single mother in her 40's and someone that I never imagined would read my blog. I couldn't stop the tears from falling when I read her e-mail. This is exactly why I continue to keep fighting. With her permission I've reposted her e-mail for you to read. Thanks Greta!

Dear Darian,

I just finished reading today's entry on your blog, and yes I am guilty of checking you out everyday and never leaving a comment. I apologize for that because my daily internet activity is not complete unless I read your blog. I realize I may not be your target audience. I am a Black heterosexual single mom in her early 40's whose been considered a "hag" for over 30 years.

During my entire existence, Black gay men have had an extraordinary impact on my life and my entire being. Black gay men have loved me, fed me, clothed me, taken me places straight men couldn't pronounce nor afford, held my hand to let me know how much I am appreciated regardless of how worthless I may have felt and helped take care of my children when I knew I couldn't do it alone. I'm crying as I type this being it's the first time I'm actually putting my words on paper. Please forgive me if I sound mushy, I don't mean to be.

At the top of my list of gay men who have been there for me has to be my oldest brother Stephen. Stephen is the one who will take custody of my 10 & 14 year old daughters should anything happen to me( even though they have a godmother who is emotionally & financially capable of handling this job). Each day I try to explain to my children how important it is to love and respect our Black gay brothers and sisters and not to fear them because at the end of the day they'll be the only ones who have your back when shit gets ugly.

In addition to my brother, I've had wonderful lifelong friendships with childhood buddies, co-workers and neighbors from the gay community. I've also lost so many beautiful Black gay men in my life due to AIDS, drugs and depression. It hurts me so much to know that my children will never have the pleasure of being surrounded with so much love that these men(Uncle Lorenzo, Uncle Eddie, Uncle Timothy) gave me.

Darian, I have never met you but believe me when I say I LOVE YOU! I am so proud of you. You are a STRONG, BEAUTIFUL, BLACK MAN!!! Please, Please, Please promise me you will never give up. The LGBT community needs you, the Black community needs you, America needs you. I've been meaning to send you line for a long time but felt maybe you didn't need to hear from another pissed off black woman with too much time on her hands. But after reading how helpless you felt, I had to let you know you are not alone in your struggle with feeling hopeless.

Darian, you are an unsung hero. Do you realize how many children you may have saved from jumping off a bridge, from putting a gun to their mouth and pulling the trigger or from overdosing on pills just by reading your words of encouragement. Please do not sell yourself short. You may not see instant results with your activism but believe me you are having an impact. Regardless of how much hate mail you get, those people can never destroy your spirit, your soul or what's in your heart. Keep doin' the damn thing baby!
May God Continue to Bless You

Love Always,
Greta
Brooklyn, NY