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3 comments | Tuesday, August 19, 2008

"The black gay community has no leadership". This is a statement that came up in a conversation I had with a young brother on yesterday who had recently come out and was literally searching for his identity through the club and bar scene. He had no idea what it meant to be black and gay in America or the challenges that lie ahead.

I was fortunate to discover a positive role model in one of the few openly black gay men on the national scene during my coming out. Today there is a void where he once stood. In a conversation a few years ago he reminded me that it was impossible for one person to speak for an entire community and we all had a voice and the ability to lead.

Since that conversation I've seen this truth manifest itself in my life and the lives of many black gay men who are coming out of the shadows and sharing their stories of being black and gay in America. Xem Van Adams is one of those men.

It all starts with us. Get into Xem's video above and click here to learn more about him.

Thanks Xem for allowing your light shine.


<$BlogCommentAuthor$> said...

This young man is amazing. As a middle-aged black gay man, however, it made me a little sad. Sad because we older black gay men did not do more to build a stronger foundation for the younger gay men.

But what about the fact that 46% of black gay men are HIV positive? That has to be the MOST important issue facing black gay men today whether they are HIV positive or not.

August 19, 2008 2:09 PM

<$BlogCommentAuthor$> said...

what i have learned is that if you truly want to live a life that is pleasing to god you have to live a life that will allow you to be nothing short of who god made you to be.it took me a minute but i am so glad that i am enjoying this life that god gave me as a gay black man and if you don't wanna be around me then its your lost

August 19, 2008 7:55 PM

<$BlogCommentAuthor$> said...

I whole heartedly understand what he is talking about. As a 32 year old man, I was called out in the 3rd grade as a fudge packer and been teased ever since by kids who are ghetto. I wanted to kill myself when I was 14 years old. I came out when I was 20, and I NEVER had a strong, masculine, gay role model, and I had to wing it on my own, and I have made mistakes in this life.

And now I wish that I had a role model to have in my life to show me the ropes on how to be responsible, how to date other guys, and past this on to other young men who are coming out or out already so that they do not make the same mistakes that others have made before them.

I just wish that black people that are heterosexual just grow up and face reality that black gay men and women WILL never go back into the closet. I also, believe that over time, people will come to a conclusion that being intolerable, not only will block out good people in your life, which is not God like at all.
Now the time of the essence, to put the brakes on HIV/AIDS, because it taking people out of here too soon. 46%!!! Is too much! We better get it together or else.

August 20, 2008 9:46 AM


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