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5 comments | Monday, April 07, 2008

I don't know how I missed this story last week, but I thought it was worth mentioning. I'm sure you're all wondering what took him so long to publicly disclose what we knew about him all along. My gaydar never fails me.

via Towleroad

Stephen from The Real World: Seattle accepted an award for his castmate Irene at The Real World Awards Bash: Roast 'Em and Toast 'Em (yes, the show has been on so long they have awards for it now). Stephen also announced that he's gay and he's getting married.

Said Stephen: "I am engaged. I'm engaged now. I'm getting ready to hitch it and it's actually with my partner (Sheldon, below) and he's a really great guy and I'm very much in love and very proud of his achievements and looking forward to achieving a lot together."

You may remember the controversial moment when Stephen opened a car door and slapped Irene during that season. Apparently there's still a lot of lingering anger. At the awards, Stephen and Seattle's Nathan got into it as Nathan accused Stephen of lying about having made up with Irene while accepting the award on stage.

Check out the video below. Do you remember when The Real World was actually about more than sex in a hot tub with strangers? Think back to the first season with the "angry black man" Kevin, the newly out gay guy Norman, the rapper Heather B, and the small town girl from Alabama Julie. I miss those days.


<$BlogCommentAuthor$> said...

How much easier would his life have been if he'd been in a space--emotionally, spiritually, geographically--that supported his living as an out gay man. His denial was at dysfunctional levels.


April 07, 2008 6:29 PM

<$BlogCommentAuthor$> said...

Black gay men, generally speaking, are so uneasy about being "out" gay men because they have nothing to come out to. I'm referring to the ones who have the option of being in or out. Some of us were always "clockable" and so didn't have a choice about being out.

If a black gay man wants to be out, he will more than likely encounter resistance from both gay and straight black people. He's damned if he does and damned if he doesn't. He's a demon if he hides (down-low) or if he's out he's a disgrace to "black manhood". Ironically, he will probably feel safer being out in a white gay space. And, of course, if he does that he will be accused by insecure black gay men of hating himself and his black gay "brothers" when all he really wants to do is be himself.

A black gay man who wants to live an open life has to go it alone and find himself through trial and error. There is little in the way of community between black gay men, as a group, except for sex and parties. There's nothing wrong with sex and parties but if that's all the black gay "community" has to offer, it's not offering food for the soul.

Black gay men, generally, have been (are) dysfunctional in terms of self-acceptance. At the end of the day, a black gay man comes out in his own good time when he feels it's "safe". I feel this rule should apply unless the individual is publicly anti-gay in which case he should be forced out of the closet.

April 08, 2008 9:22 AM

<$BlogCommentAuthor$> said...

i always believed stephen was "clockable" from the jump but he said he wasn't gay so i left it alone. i applaud him for coming out of the closet though.

i do hope that after the altercation at the awards show, that stephen decides not to entertain the incident w/ irene publicly any longer. it was obvious that people (including the show) still feel compelled to give him a hard time about it.

April 09, 2008 11:35 AM

<$BlogCommentAuthor$> said...

Stephen has been out for years. When I was at the Beach Party during LA pride 4 years ago he was hosting.

April 17, 2008 7:31 AM

<$BlogCommentAuthor$> said...

I thought he was out? Oh wait, nevermind, He was hanging with gay men on the show and criticizing. See, its always the ones who fuss the most. But (even though I don't like to stereotype)he was obviously gay on the show. Are those pretty eyes his?

April 18, 2008 1:41 AM


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