Internet rumors are swirling around the inevitable divorce of Al and Star Jones- Reynolds. Reportedly Al was seen leaving a very high profile divorce lawyer's office in New York after a 2 hour visit.
Now allow me to vent for a minute in a few questions that I hope to answer or at least spark some dialogue.
1. Why is it that the entire world seems to know that Al is gay except for Star?
2.Why do so many women enter into unauthentic marriages with gay men?
3. Why do so many gay men enter into unauthentic marriages with women?
I do not know the reason why Al and Star decided to get married, but let's just say for the hell of it they actually love each other (doubt it!).
What I do know is a gay man when I see one, and Al definitely falls into the category. I have a feeling in a few months Star will be sitting on Oprah's couch giving us an encore performance of Terry McMillan's drama!
How does she not know that this man is gay? Could it be that she is only allowing herself to see the life she has created in her mind and not reality?
I know what it feels like to get caught up in the fantasy of being in love, and even when it's obvious the reality has fell short of the fantasy you continue to hold onto what you have for fear of being alone. So that's her excuse, what's his?
I think it's safe to assume that Al is aware of his same-sex attraction and simply married for money and fame. Were any of us talking about Al pre Star Jones?
My problem is with Al and other gay men like him who get married and lead these unauthentic lives and contribute to the already skyrocketing divorce rates. Why do these men feel the need to adopt the heterosexual privilege?
Do they feel pressured to conform to society's expectations for their life? Are they just so uncomfortable with their true sexuality that they use marriage as medicine to cure their homosexuality?
Will someone please let me know, because I've never been able to disregard what I knew to be inherently true about myself to play a role to please others or to trick myself into believing I was somebody other than who God designed me to be.
I honestly feel sorry for the both of them, because in the end someone is going to walk away with a damaged heart, and a life lesson learned the hard way.
3 Comments:
I still haven't really looked at the man or see what he does that ticks other people's dars off.
-Marz
July 19, 2006 4:29 PM
1. Star knows... if she did not know when she married him she definitely knows now... I am sure some stuff came out that she did not know about after they got married. You know how the boys try to keep stuff under wraps but as soon as it looks like you have a good thing going for yourself all of your dirty laundry reappears.
2/3. I don't know if it is fair to say that people enter into "unauthentic" relationships. I believe that people want to be happy. Your gay experience is different from the next person's gay experience. My gay experience is different from the next person's. Perhaps they were both looking for something that they thought the other could give.
The only way that a relationship is unauthentic is if someone is holding some truth from someone in the beginning. That is when a relationship is built on false pretenses. Was this one of those relationships? Maybe, maybe not. I don't know, because I know neither one of them.
What I do know is that Al is gay and I could have told Star that if only she had called me... If she did not know when they got married she should have known by the time when he got extensions in his head(those pics were floating around a while back).
It is a sad situation. Almost like a ticking time bomb.
July 19, 2006 7:40 PM
I knew Al was gay. If she didn't it's just that she didn't want to know. She probaly thought that she could change him. It's the same for any sex relationship (m/f, f/f, m/m). Sometimes people disregard what they don't want to know. "No he isn't cheating." "That's my baby- she has indian in her family." "They're just friends- so what they talk til the whee hours of the morning." "He is not gay." It is called denial. Keep telling yourself that.
By the way, D-, you got my aunt raging about this issue. She agrees with you. You need a syndicated column.
August 09, 2006 5:10 PM
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