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2 comments | Thursday, May 31, 2007



From The Republic of T.

To the Editors of Ebony Magazine:

I grew up with Ebony. My parents subscribed to both Ebony, and I can recall grabbing each new issue and reading it cover to cover when it arrived. But eventually I stopped rushing to pick it up, and rarely read it as an adult. The reason is because I so rarely saw myself reflected in its pages. I felt invisible.

I am a black gay man. I am also a father. So when I saw your cover story, “The New Black Father,” I bought a copy and was as anxious to read it as I had been when I was growing up. Again, I was disappointed.

Maybe it’s because your feature seemed to focus on fathers who were celebrities (or whose children were celebrities), executives or organization heads, but I was dismayed to find that not only were no black gay fathers profiled in your feature article, but the article itself failed to even mention that we exist. Neither does the National Fatherhood Initiative, which was mentioned in your article. Their website makes no mention of our families either. It’s as if we don’t exist.

Well, we do exist, and we are working just as hard at being good parents as the men featured in your article. I know several black gay fathers myself. Some of us are raising children from previous relationships. Some of us are raising children we’ve adopted. Some as single parents, and some with our partners in committed relationships. Many of us are raising African American sons and daughters. Some of us are doing so with the full support or our families and communities. And, lacking that, some of us have built “families of choice” to support and celebrate our families. All of us are working every day to be the best fathers we can to our children.

We exist. The National Black Justice Coalition has a wealth of information about our families, including data from the 2000 census which indicates that 61% of black female same-sex households included children, as do 46% of black male same-sex households. Another document, Jumping the Broom, says that in my own state — Maryland — the majority of same-sex households in the metro area are headed by black-same sex female couples, and 41% of same-sex households are headed by black male same-sex couples. It also features two families with raising children, one female couple and one male. I suggest you check it out.

In truth, these numbers are probably conservative, given that they depend on people openly indicating on the census that theirs is a same-sex household. There are many of us who might not do so, because we fear the consequences of being “outed” in our families and communities; afraid that we might face rejection or even hostility. And so we remain as invisible in our communities as we are in the June 2007 issue of your magazine.

I know that including our families might upset some of your readers, who will undoubtedly ask what kind father someone like me could possibly be.

I can only answer that I am the kind of father I learned how to be from my father, whom I was blessed to have in my life for 38 years, and in our home during the entire time I was growing up. He was a loving and faithful husband to my mother for 50 years, and a good father to me and my siblings. I learned from him that being a father means being a man. I learned that being a man means taking responsibility and being there for my family. It means showing up. Every day, in every way. I learned that being a man has as much to do with gentleness as it does with strength, and that sometimes it means being unashamed to cry openly. I learned that being a man has as much to do with kindness as it does with courage; as much to do with compassion as it does with discipline and resolve. That’s the kind of father my dad taught me to be, and the kind of father I am trying to be to my son.

I am a black gay father raising a black son whom my partner and I adopted at four days old. We chose adopt an African American infant for several reasons, and among them was the knowledge that African American infants and children are less often adopted than their white counterparts. We were chosen by his birth mother, who felt that we would raise him with unconditional love and —being an interracial couple as well as a same-sex couple — could empower him to face the prejudices he will almost certainly encounter, both as a black man and a son with same-sex parents. We are raising a black son whose birth father ran away from the responsibility to care for him and raise him. Where he said “no,” we said “yes.”

As a child, some of the most positive images I saw of African Americans were in Ebony magazine. When my parents told me I could do anything and be anything as long as I was willing to work for it, Ebony gave me examples of everything that was possible and everything accomplished people a lot like me. I saw a positive reflection of myself, for a while.

I hope that in the future Ebony will be more inclusive in the future, and show the true diversity of black families, and that it can be for my son that it was for me.

Sincerely,

Terrance Heath

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Summer is quickly approaching and gay pride celebrations will be taking place all over the country. More than ever before same gender loving people have so much to celebrate, from making the important step of coming out, to legal victories in the fight for marriage equality, and increasing visibility in the media, LGBT people are out and celebrating who we are for all the world to see.

Beginning today About.com writer Ramone Johnson will be bringing millions of readers thirty interviews in thirty days from some of your favorite gay celebritys, icons, and supporters. Get ready to dive inside the minds of director and filmaker Lee Daniels, singer Jody Watley, actor Jensen Atwood, author E. Lynn Harris, and tv personality and activist Karamo Brown just to name a few.

This is sure to be a hot series of interviews and you will be able to get an exclusive preview here on this site thanks to the man himself, Ramone Johnson. You definitely don't want to miss this month long gay pride celebration. Stay tuned because there's more to come.

59 comments | Wednesday, May 30, 2007



There are very few things in life that I regret, meeting my ex-boyfriend would definitely be one and not attending Sizzle this year in Miami would be second. I actually had the weekend off with flying benefits and a VIP card thanks to my boss, but I chose to live vicariously through my friends who were basking in the beauty of thousands of black men on the beautiful sandy beaches of Miami.

This crazy decision definitely qualifys me for a "what in the hell were you thinking award"? . But I know I wasn't the only person absent from the festivities, so if you didn't make it down to Sizzle I'm bringing you the hottest recap of the weekend's events thanks to an anonymous guest blogger. Pictures courtesy of Lonnell Williams .

10 Things You Should Know

This year I had the opportunity to attend Miami Sizzle's 6th Annual event in sunny Miami, Florida, and to call it pandemonium would be a true understatement. CEO Dwight Powell and his team (Lorenzo Turner, Cordell McClary and Luis Medrano) launched one of the highest-octane and activity packed holiday weekends I've ever been apart of.

Miami was the perfect backdrop for this sexy, ultra-classy affair where I received eye candy that will have me running to the dentist for a fill in. In a twist this year the 4 Star Hyatt Regency Miami happily welcomed the 'gay dollar' as it acted as the host hotel instead of the satellite hotel from previous years. The city welcomed the black gay community with open arms as the mayor of the booming metropolis, Carlos Alvarez, delivered a personal welcome letter that was included in the events brochure.

Droves of same gender loving men and women came from all across the world to be a part of an event that is catered to us-and most importantly by us. From The Sizzle Booze Cruise, The True Queens Of Comedy, The Haulover Beach Control, Carnival, and everything in between. The Sizzle organization executed the daunting task of providing interesting yet sexy events flawlessly.

But don't think the Memorial Day weekend was just about parties and clubbing because it wasn't. When I needed to get away and relax I strolled on over to Sizzle Village and lost myself in the movie lounge, caught up on some emails in the Cyber Café, and just laid back in the hospitality lounge. There was a fascinating open-forum discussion on online hook-ups and sex moderated by Derrick L. Briggs. Andre Mizrahi, in association with Sizzle Miami, presented the Bring It Ball where contestants competed for a cash prize of $7, 500.00.

Since this was my inception to the ultra-elegant, five-day excursion I'll have to admit that there were a few things I did right, and a few things I did wrong. I thought that I would compile a list of do's and don'ts that will guarantee you the best experience possible while you make Miami your destination for next year's first Summer holiday weekend.

1. Purchase a VIP card! Sizzle offers different VIP access cards that secure your admission to every Sizzle sponsored event. There's no waiting in line, no worrying about getting into a party, nothing. I had one and I got the chance to see everything while my friends weren't so lucky. If you're a true baller might I suggest the VIP Black Card!

2. Rent your own vehicle and book your own hotel room!! Let's face it, friends are great and you want to experience a great time while in their company. But when it comes to hook-ups, and late night adventures, it's best that you have your own accommodations so that you don't have to answer to anyone or wait for anybody when you're out and about.

3. Leave the attitude at home! Listen, everybody knows that we gays can be some shady bitches, however, when you're coming to a gay event you need to be as open to meeting as many people as possible. In the long run you're only hurting yourself by walking around acting like your shit don't stink.

4. Safe sex is very important, but I think it's pointless to waste your money on condoms upon arriving. Every place I went over the weekend seemed to have free condoms (yes, even the ones to fit us blessed downstairs bruthas). I didn't even get a chance to crack open the fresh box of Magnum XL's I brought with me.

5. LEAVE YOUR BOYFRIENDS AT HOME!!! I can't stress this suggestion enough. This event, as classy as it is, isn't for couples. There are so many scantily clad men walking around that are bound to approach you with things other then "getting to know you" on their mind. Just don't play yourself by bringing your significant other. There are bound to be issues! I personally witnessed three couples break up while in attendance. I'm not advocating cheating, but I am sure that you're better off declining an advance on your own rather then in the company of your mate.

6. Don't get an attitude with event employees, hotel staff, or security. It's a crazy ass weekend and everybody is trying to accommodate everybody. Try to take into consideration the daunting task everyone is attempting to deal with to make your stay as enjoyable as possible.

7. Tip your bartenders! That doesn't need further explanation.

8. Bring enough money to cover your own expenses. This is another rule that I can't stress enough. With it being a holiday weekend, things are going to cost a little more than normal. Make sure your budget can accommodate you so that you don't have to impede on anyone else's finances to support your fun.

9. Don't leave your drink unattended for any reason! I had a friend fall victim to someone slipping a substance into his drink which had us rushing him to the hospital. If you put your drink down and walk away from it for any reason, consider it a wash and just purchase another one.


10. Have fun, be responsible, and make it a weekend to remember!

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0 comments | Tuesday, May 29, 2007



The name Antron R. Brown may not be familiar to you now, but it's only a matter of time before the world takes notice of this emerging black gay writer. I've had the privilege of getting to know Antron over the past couple of months and I've personally witnessed his incredible work ethic and his desire to share his God given gift with the world.

Antron is on the brink of releasing his very first self-published book entitled "Bohemian Rebel:Naked and Exposed Vol.1" . Bohemian Rebel is a collection of poetry based on Antron's experience as a Black, christian gay man growing up in the south, but his words undoubtedly mirror the experiences of so many of us.

I can't help but to think back to the early days of E. Lynn Harris when he sold his first novel out of the trunk of his car and in beauty salons. It's ironic that E. Lynn is one of Antron's inspirations because I see so much of his drive in Antron.

I recently had an opportunity to sit down with Antron and learn about his life and his new book. The interview happened on the spur of the moment after reading "Irresponsible Christianity Part 2" , a riveting poem from his book. Antron is a very colorful and honest human being, all of which you will hear in my interview. You may not know Antron now but soon you will.

Click here to listen to the full interview.

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Hey Guys! The next few weeks are going to be crazy busy for me. I'm already feeling bad about neglecting my site, but until 100% of my income comes from blogging and writing for magazines I guess I'm gonna have to hold down a "real job". This time I think I may have made a career change for the better, the next time you board a plane I'm sure you'll think of me...after all you'll be sitting in my office. The craziness started on day one and as always you know I had my camera in my pocket. Come and take off with me and my new friends Art and Cristi.

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2 comments | Sunday, May 27, 2007



Happy Memorial Day! I hope that everyone had a safe and enjoyable holiday weekend. From Miami to Washington D.C. and even Puerto Rico, there was an abundance of events for Black gays and lesbians over the weekend. However, my holiday was spent at home in Atlanta preparing for my trip to Indianapolis. I will be spending the next three weeks training for my new career as a stewardess...I mean flight attendant. LOL!

I've been told that training is very intense and every day is an audition. I will continue to blog while I'm there, but I'm going to rely heavily on a few very talented guest columnists that will be sharing their gifts on the site during my absence.

I've got some really great posts coming your way this week and I can't wait to share them all with you. Thanks for all of the prayers and well wishes, your support means the world to me. Don't forget to subscribe to Living Out Loud with Darian, just enter your e-mail address in the field at the top of the site and you'll get to read my thoughts everyday in your inbox. Now that's special !

To all of my new readers and subscribers, welcome aboard! Fasten your seat belt and prepare for take off.

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8 comments | Thursday, May 24, 2007


Ok so I just made up that word, anyway it's my blogaversary and you're all invited to the party! I can't believe it's been an entire year since I sat down to write my very first post. I had no idea that Living Out Loud with Darian would take on a life of it's own and turn into something that I look forward to writing everyday and a site that thousands of people look forward to reading. I've been so incredibly blessed this past year. You, my readers have been there through the good and the bad. I can't thank you guys enough for participating in my journey.

For those of you who may be new to the site, go ahead and click on the following links and you can read about the events that inspired the site that you're visiting today. I've also created a special video(you know I love my video blogs!)to celebrate my first blogaversary. A special thank you to Bernie Tarver , LT , Trent Jackson , Tramaine Renee , Riley , Brian "Mandiva" Taylor, Ramone Johnson , Steven and Jason Steed for participating in the video and Marvin for editing.

How It All Started:

A Letter To Mom

It All Started with Keith













1 comments | Tuesday, May 22, 2007








Ladies and Gentlemen, the new issue of CLIK Magazine has finally arrived and it's on fire ! This is the biggest issue of Clik ever and readers will have the opportunity to choose from two different covers. This issue has a little bit for everyone, fashion, health and fitness, movies, music, and of course great interviews.

Steven Emmanuel-Martinez better known as Queer Kid of Color does an amazing job highlighting openly gay artists Jesse O and Tyrangem . Steven also goes inside of the mind of the "person that we all love to hate", my friend Trent Jackson . Another highlight is an article on the growing popularity of The & Show on YouTube starring Jared Shuler and Nathan Seven Scott.

Clik Magazine has come a long way from it's humble beginnings as a small "Jet style" magazine that was passed out at nightclubs for free in the late nineties. It's become a respected source of information and entertainment for the Black gay community. Wanna get your hands on a copy? Click here .

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MTV'S LOGO network has licensed the short film "On The Low" by writer/director Luther Mace to be shown as apart of The Click List: Best In Short Film . "On the Low" explores the emotional consequences of a hush-hush intimate relationship between two African-American hugh school boys. It tells the story of a young man Ty Evans, played by Deondray Gossett(The D.L. Chronicles) who is coming to terms with his sexuality and the inner conflict he experiences. The true extent of Ty's relationship with his classmate, Kevin Banks, begins to trouble him when the boys get into a schoolyard shoving match.

As the tension between them escalates, Ty realizes what began as innocent curiosity and experimentation has blossomed into something deeper.

The cast also includes the talent of Tommy Ford , widely known for his portrayal of the character Tommy from the nineties sitcom Martin .

I was fortunate enough to catch a screening of On The Low last year and it did not disappoint. I just wish it could have been longer than fifteen minutes. Luckily, a feature film version is in the works. I'm sure after you get a chance to see the short you're going to crave more. Catch "On The Low" on Wednesday night on LOGO.

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The following article was written for Clik Magazine during the height of the Terry McMillan and Jonathan Plummer $40 million dollar lawsuit scandal. It was scheduled to be included in the current issue but in the world of journalism stories get old fast and there's always something hotter around the corner. I spoke to Jonathan over the phone about two months ago and he agreed to talk to me off the record, due to his pending legal issues.

It was an hour long conversation that I thought was going to end fairly quickly since Jonathan was so apprehensive about talking to me, but once he opened up I couldn't stop him from talking. It was my objective to really find out why some gay men feel the need to marry women. I could never do it, but so many people have. My interview with Jonathan and all of the drama between he and Terry McMillan gave me the words to write "The Aftermath of I Do".

The Aftermath of I Do
by Darian Aaron

They’re at it again. Just when we thought the drama surrounding the divorce of Terry McMillan and Jonathan Plummer was over; we’re caught off guard by a 40 million dollar lawsuit filed against her now openly gay ex-husband.

It’s been over two years since Terry learned of the Jonathan’s secret that would eventually ruin their marriage. A secret that Jonathan claims even he wasn’t aware of until his late twenties. The young man who had managed to sweep her off her feet at forty-three, inspired a best -selling novel, and became the first to offer his hand in marriage was gay. The fairy tale romance that usually ends with two lovers riding off into the sunset had been re-written to include betrayal and outrage. This became painfully obvious as we watched Terry and Jonathan’s personal life play out in the public arena. Who could forget the dozens of television appearances and newspaper articles that provided a platform for tongue-lashings, homophobic slurs, and an overall emotional meltdown by a woman who seemed to have it all?

Fast forward to the present and Terry’s still not done. It is seemingly obvious that her erratic behavior is a result of heartache and revenge has become her weapon of choice on the difficult road to closure. Many black women sympathize with Terry’s plight, viewing Jonathan Plummer as a down low opportunist who used her to gain entry into the United States. Could this be true? In the court of public opinion the verdict is yes, but only Jonathan knows the real answer to this question.

There are so many questions that have either gone unanswered or haven’t been up for discussion that reach far beyond the relationship of these two celebrities into the larger gay community. Why do some gay men feel the need to marry women? It’s obvious after watching Terry and Jonathan’s drama unfold that nothing good can possibly come out of a marriage that is based on lies. Could it be that these men are caving into pressure from family, church, and society and the idea that a man isn’t a man unless he has a woman on his arm?

I’ve heard many people say, “How could she not know he’s gay, just look at him”. The reality is that love can blind you from seeing the truth even when it’s staring you right in the face. We only see the fantasy we’ve conjured up in our mind and we ignore all of the signs that point to the truth. It’s easier said than done for some men to live life authentically. Jonathan claims he was unaware of his attraction to men at the time he committed his life to his ex-wife and it wasn’t until later that he began to act on his sexual feelings. While his attraction to other men is completely natural, many would agree that his infidelity was wrong. Unfortunately, this seems to be common behavior among many gay men who enter into unauthentic relationships, eventually the natural outweighs the unnatural and keeping up the facade becomes less important.

Terry has made it very clear that she doesn’t feel sorry for Jonathan because he wasn’t man enough to be forthcoming about his sexuality, “ I don't care how long he's been in the closet; I didn't put him in there.” she’s said.
She may not have put him in the closet and closed the door, but her homophobic remarks and the tolerance for anti-gay slurs in this country has definitely created an atmosphere where it’s next to impossible for a gay man to come out without the fear of rejection or being subjected to violence.

Knowing this does not excuse Jonathan or any man to enter into a union as serious as marriage under false pretenses. Doing so only welcomes unnecessary pain, and if you’re Terry McMillan, a restraining order followed by a $40 million dollar lawsuit.

It seems Jonathan has done his best to move on and has adopted his ex-wife’s profession in the process. In August he will be releasing “Balancing Act”, a book that Jonathan says will reveal his side of the story. There is no doubt that his literary turn has added more fuel to the fire between him and Terry.

For the time being it seems as though this very private matter will continue to play itself out in public. This very expensive and messy divorce should serve as a lesson to gay men everywhere who enter into heterosexual relationships with motives other than to love, cherish, and honor his wife. While both Terry and Jonathan are free to lead their lives on their own terms, their future relationships are sure to be affected by this painful experience.

It’s time for Terry to gain attention again based on her ability to write stories and less on her ability to air her dirty laundry for the entire world to see. A very wise man once told me that it’s not what happens to you in life, but it’s how you react that’s important. I’d like to pass along that advice to Terry.

Hopefully Jonathan and men like him will think twice before they promise to be present for a woman emotionally, especially when their heart truthfully belongs to another man. The road to healing can often be rocky and embarrassing, just asks Terry.

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Have you guys ever noticed how hard it is to only watch one video on youtube? At the end of each video they give you similar videos to choose from and before you know it the five minutes you'd planned on spending watching one video has turned into an hour.This happened to me last night as I was searching for a rare performance of Janet on the Rosie O'Donnell show(I know it's hard to believe there's a Janet performance I haven't seen).

I'd planned on bringing you guys something different today but this youtube thing just took over last night. So in the spirit of my friend Trent Jackson I've decided to share the videos that kept me up all night.







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11 comments | Monday, May 21, 2007




This youtube video is of American Christians on gay marriage. I'd planned on writing a lengthy response on the outrageous statements they make in this video, but it would be a complete waste of time and once you view this video you'll understand why.

A word of advice: If you're going to be against something at least be able to clearly articulate why you feel a certain way. And having facts to back up your beliefs might not be a bad idea either.

Thanks to Pam's House Blend for the tip-off.

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Throughout my series of commentaries it has been my intention to challenge you to examine your life in order to facilitate your spiritual growth. My goal is to help you judge how much your life reflects the life of Jesus Christ. I would like to continue the discussion looking at a subject that we have talked about previously, choosing between flesh and Spirit. In looking at this topic again, I would to use a different scripture than I have used to this point. Romans 8:1-6:

1.So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. 2.And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death. 3.The law of Moses was unable to save us because of the weakness of our sinful nature. So God did what the law could not do. He sent his own Son in a body like the bodies we sinners have. And in that body God declared an end to sin’s control over us by giving his Son as a sacrifice for our sins. 4.He did this so that the just requirement of the law would be fully satisfied for us, who no longer follow our sinful nature but instead follow the Spirit. 5.Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the Spirit. 6.So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace. (New Living Translation)

The text needs very little explanation. I would like to point out something that may seem obvious to some but can never be overstated. The central tenet of Christianity is belief in Jesus Christ as the son of God; living, dying, and risen from the dead. In so doing Jesus not only takes the punishment for the sins of the world he also gains victory over death. According to Romans 6:23 death is the result of sin. It is my mission to share the Gospel to all who will hear it that the Spirit of Christ might continually be visible in the earth.

Whether we know it or not our connection to Christ does not end with our profession of faith. The profession of faith begins a transforming journey of our consciousness from what we know ourselves to be, flesh, to who God created us to be before the foundations of the world, spirit. The Apostle Paul said it this way in 2 Corinthians 5:17, “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”

God does not see us in the same way that we see ourselves. When we describe ourselves, we use the physical characteristics, occupation, and even our place in society. When God looks at us He sees a reflection of Himself. The challenge comes when we have to fight between how our flesh may define us and how Spirit (God) defines us. If we are to live victorious Christian lives we can no longer govern ourselves by what flesh wants. When talking about “flesh,” we do no minimize its definition to just sex. The works of the flesh are outlined in Galatians 5:19-21. We are all guilty of the sin outlined in this passage. The benefits of the kingdom here on earth are righteousness, peach and joy in the Holy Ghost. You “inherit” these benefits when you live a life that transcends flesh and operates fully in the Spirit. This is the ultimate goal of salvation.


You can never have life, peace and joy as God intended as long as your life is defined by carnal things. Life in the Spirit is so much bigger than what we can see with our natural eye. As I have said before, we are the expression of God in the earth. Without transforming our thinking from carnal to spiritual, we are destined to live well beneath our privilege. The goal of the Christian life is not simply to go to heaven. The goal is to have heaven on earth. The first step to heaven on earth is to choose: flesh or Spirit. Which do you choose?

Romans 6:23

Galatians
:19-21


Email Albert: albertrlee@hotmail.com
Myspace

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The weather is starting to warm up in Atlanta and summer is quickly approaching, so that means all of the hard work that was put in in gyms all over the city will be displayed over the next few months as people start to wear less.

I caught a glimpse of what's to come as I strolled through Piedmont Park on Sunday with my good friends Tramaine , Lonnell , and Riley. Piedmont Park has become the official gathering place for Black gays and lesbians on Sundays. I'd never experienced Piedmont on a Sunday because I'm usually at work, so I only lived vicariously through all of the stories I'd heard.

As I approached the park it was hard to believe that it was not Black Pride weekend because there were hundreds of beautiful men and women all over the place. To say that I was a little overwhelmed would be an understatement. I remember years ago when I first began to deal with the truth of my sexuality and how isolated I felt from the rest of the world, if only I could have been dropped off in the middle of Piedmont Park on a Sunday I would have realized that I was not alone! LOL!

Now of course you know I had my camera in my pocket(never leave home without it). Watch Tramaine and Lonnell give you the lowdown on one of the gayest places in Atlanta in the clip above.

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Ok so I know I might regret this post later but I'm going to write it anyway. I stepped on the scale this morning and was horrified to find out that I'm not losing any weight(as a result of walking the park 2 to 3 times a week) but I've actually gained two more pounds! Right now I'm at 185.5 pounds. All I can see is stepping on the scale in the near future and seeing the 185 pounds increase to 200 pounds. Bare with me because I'm freaking out! I've never weighed this much in my adult life. I've always been able to eat what I wanted without worrying about packing on the pounds. Is it because I'm getting older or maybe because I'm not dancing as much as I did before?

I'm 5'9 and at 185 pounds I'm considered overweight for my height. The funny thing is that I'm still trim up top but once you get to my lower body it's all ass and legs!
I think this is where all of the extra weight is going. My new love interest doesn't seem to mind but I do.

I've never been able to commit to an exercise regimen at a gym so that's out of the question. Although my new love interest is motivating me, he could sell thousands of copies of those muscle magazines if he were on the cover, but I digress.

I need your advice on how I can change my eating habits so I can lose at least 10 pounds over the next four weeks. I don't cook and I hate salads and vegetables, but I do love McDonalds. Help!

2 comments | Friday, May 18, 2007



B-BOY BLUES: The Movie CASTING!
LOOKING FOR RAHIEM!!!!

Director Maurice Jamal (Dirty Laundry, The Ski Trip) ,
Producer Carol Ann Shine (Noah's Arc)and
the Production team behind B-BOY BLUES: The Movie
hit the road next week in search of a star for the
film adaptation of the best-selling novel, by James Earl Hardy!


Representing a unique opportunity for new talent or an experienced actor wanting that breakout role, the creative team behind one of the years most anticipated romantic dramas, B-BOY BLUES will tour the U.S., looking for the “Rahiem” who will star in this major motion-picture! Casting will take place in several major U.S cities.

“Raheim is an iconic character” says author James Earl Hardy. “Casting him represents an amazing challenge because he has to explode from the moment he hits the screen.”

Director Maurice Jamal adds: “This character is great! He’s masculine, sexy, appealing, charming,. He’s from the streets and gets want he wants. He has to have a dangerous side as well. You have to feel that tension, that battle raging inside him.”

Producer Carol Ann Shine, from TV's Noah's Arc, and producer of the BBB film notes: "This film is fresh, funny and shows a side of the community we've never seen before. I couldn't be more proud."


This is a breakout role. No doubt about it!”


Casting for “Rahiem”: Actors and models with experience and people with that "something special" are encouraged to send their information. Those selected will be contacted via email and will be scheduled for an audition for the for the director, casting director and author James Earl Hardy! Interested parties must be in attendance, or able to travel to one of the casting sessions listed below:

Los Angeles, CA.
Mon., May 21 and Tues., May 22, 2007

Miami, FL
Sat., May 26 and Sun., May 27, 2007
Memorial Day Weekend
Sizzle, Miami

New York, NY
June 22 and 25, 2007



“RAHIEM”
Submit if you are: Af-Amer., male; ages 18-27; strong acting skills; in great shape; significant sex appeal. This character is a hard-core player; thugged out; masculine; early to mid 20’s; from Harlem (ability to do NY accent a strong plus).
Must be comfortable playing gay role.

Please submit information, performing resume (if available) and two pictures
(one face/headshot, one body shot.NO nudes.) ASAP to:


Casting@BBoyBluesTheMovie.com or mojamfilms@aol.com
Please put “RAHEIM” in the subject line.

Visit: BboyBluesTheMovie.com for more information and updates.

1 comments | Thursday, May 17, 2007




Do you guys remember the show Noah's Arc? Hopefully this groundbreaking show hasn't faded off into the back of your minds just yet. But if it has the talented and beautiful cast along with LOGO is gearing up to release the full second season on dvd June 12th.

This box set is sure to become a collector's item since we'll probably never see a third season of LOGO's first successful scripted show. I guess we'll just have to wait for the movie to come out next year. You remember the movie LOGO announced they were making as they quietly cancelled the show from their line up.

Thank God for iTunes because I was able to purchase both seasons and save them on my computer. I still watch my favorite episodes and reminisce about a time when there were characters on television I could identify with...those were the days.

Order your copy of Noah's Arc season two here .

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Yesterday I had the privilege of sharing my story as an openly gay christian for an untitled documentary due out at the end of the year. The film will tell the stories of over a dozen Black LGBT people from all over the country and their experiences in the Black church.

I know for some LGBT people the church is totally off limits and I can't say I blame them given how cruel most pastors and congregations have been towards SGL people. I was raised in a christian home and attended catholic school until my junior year, so my relationship with God became an important part of my development, and once I decided to embrace my sexuality I couldn't fathom that my being gay would separate me from the love of God. Although I was told differently I knew in my heart I was created in God's image and my life was not a mistake.

I know there are so many of us who are tied to churches because of family or tradition and we've come to expect and accept the rampant homophobia that's so prevalent today. I found out years ago that this was a hinderance to my spiritual growth and I had to make a decision to say enough is enough. I would no longer attend a church that had no problem taking my tithes and offering but would not accept me fully as a SGL christian.

People can debate all day long whether or not they think honosexuality is a sin, and to be honest it's not my life's mission to prove that it isn't to those who believe that it is wrong. But as long as LGBT youth are depressed, suicidal, and homeless due to religious bigotry and intolerance, I will continue to speak out against the dogma being preached from pulpits all over the country. After all the church should be a house of joy and not a house of pain.

11 comments | Wednesday, May 16, 2007




The lives of LGBT people have been explored quite a few times recently in the media, from 20/20's story on transgender children, to the MSNBC special "Born In The Wrong Body", to the handful of victories across the nation for marriage equality, it seems Americans are more comfortable with images of LGBT people entering their homes and their lives.

Unlike years ago we have at least come to a place where we can talk about our differences openly with hopes of learning from each other. I'm often asked if I had the opportunity to become straight would I change my orientation and the answer to that question is no.

60 Minutes is currently running a story exclusively online on the origins of sexual orientation. The study even examines the differences in brain structure, mannerisms, and speech patterns between heterosexual and homosexual individuals, with all signs leading to nature over nurture. I've written about whether or not I think homosexuality is a choice before and it still baffles me when I hear heterosexuals boldly proclaim that it's a choice that can be easily undone without giving it a second thought. I'm still waiting for a hetero to tell me the day and time they chose to become straight...it hasn't happened yet. Truth be told (at least as I see it) your sexual orientation is indigenous to who you are.

This couldn't be more evident than in the case of nine year olds Jared and Adam, two paternal twins who couldn't be any more different. While Jared finds pleasure in his G.I. Joe collection his brother Adam paints his nails and collects Barbies. When Adam's mom was asked why she didn't do anything to change her son's behavior she replied, " I could have changed Adam on the outside and he may have shown me the macho boy I wanted him to be, but that wouldn't have changed him on the inside and I think that would have damaged him a lot more".

When Adam was asked if he was proud of the person he is today he responded by shaking his head yes as the most innocent and loving smile appeared on his face. Adam's attraction to the things that are deemed appropriate for the opposite sex is just as natural to him as his brother Jared's affection for his G.I. Joe collection. It saddens me that Adam may not gain the acceptance from the rest of the world as he matures that he does from his family. If only adults could love more and judge less the world would be a much nicer place.

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I don't think I ever want to watch American Idol again. The show is quickly losing it's credibility with me. First we had to endure Sanjaya for half of the season and now we have to say goodbye to the best singer and most consistent performer on the show, Melinda Doolittle. I should have known the voters and American Idol producers were going to pull a stunt like this, there is no way that Blake should still be left standing and Melinda is sent packing.

Randy Jackson predicted that if the final two were about pure singing ability then Jordin and Melinda would be in the finale, well I should have known that talent alone wouldn't have been enough to guarantee Melinda a spot. Think about what we listen to on the radio everyday, not very many successful singers have the chops that Melinda does and they're still selling millions of albums and selling out arenas.

Although she was eliminated I'm sure she will still have a wondeful career, her talent is undeniabe. But what in the hell was America thinking?!! But on the flip side, Jennifer Hudson was eliminated too and look at her now. Don't even get me started on Reuben Studdard and Taylor Hicks. Did you just ask yourself who are they? I rest my case.

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4 comments | Tuesday, May 15, 2007



Hey Everyone ! Hopefully by now you've noticed that there's some new additions to the site. I spent about four hours yesterday with my friend and fellow blogger LT giving LOLDARIAN a little face lift. If you notice right under my banner is where you can sign up to get e-mail updates and to the left you will find a real blogroll, these are my favorite blogs that I visit on a daily basis.

There is also a myspace icon that you can click on that will lead you directly to my myspace profile. In the same area is a photo slideshow that I will be updating frequently, and my new favorite thing, LOLDARIAN TV. By clicking on this link you will gain access to my youtube channel where you will find my personal video blogs as well as some of my favorite youtube videos. I'm also really excited about the space alloted for advertisements, a piece of the pie that I'd been missing this past year.

I will be celebrating my one year blog anniversary on the 26th of this month and I've got something really special planned and I can't wait to share it with all of you. Over the next few days I will be busy being filmed for a documentary on being Black and gay in the church as well as preparing for my new career as a flight attendant. I did tell you guys about that...right? So forgive me if I get behind on posting new content.

Life is good. Thanks so much for all of your support! And let me give a special shout out to all of the haters...I embrace you.

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Developing Story- Televangelist and founder of the Moral Majority Rev. Jerry Falwell has passed away, he was 73 years old. Rev. Falwell was found unconscious in his office on the campus of Liberty University this morning around 11 AM. He was pronounced dead about an hour later at Lynchburg General Hospital.

Falwell has been a vocal opponent of equal rights for gays and lesbians for years, often citing scripture to support his views.The most infamous quote regarding the LGBT community came after the 9-11 attacks. Fellow bloggerRod McCollum revists that unfortunate quote by Rev. Falwell on his site.

Over the next few days I'm sure we're going to hear statements from The White House since Jerry Falwell and his followers had so much influence on the politics of the current administration. Stay tuned...

UPDATE: I've spent much of the afternoon trying to figure out how to address Falwell's legacy without disrespecting him now that he's gone and I've decided to live by the childhood rule "if you don't have something nice to say about someone, then don't say anything at all. Instead I would like to draw your attention to an article from The Associated Press that chronicles Rev. Falwell's early years to his final hours.

5 comments | Monday, May 14, 2007



My favorite entertainer Ms. Janet Jackson turns 41 on Wednesday and I will be celebrating her life and career all week on my site. Janet was born to Joseph and Katherine Jackson in Gary, India on May 16, 1966 . She's the youngest of nine children and arguably the most successful of the bunch, next to Michael of course. Janet's 1986 video Control ignited my passion for dance and began a lifelong love affair with the Queen of Pop.

Before I started formal training in dance I would lock myself in my room for hours and learn all of the choreography in her videos( don't act like I was the only person that did this! LOL ) . Anyone who knows me personally knows how much I love Janet, no other artist moves me like she does.

I wish I was able to convey how much I love and respect Janet as an artist and humanitarian but I just can't find the words. Throughout the week I will be sharing with you guys some of my favorite Janet moments, especially the first time we met...now that was dramatic! Get into some of my favorite Janet performances and a special video I made for the release of 20 Y.O. Happy Birthday Janet all week long !

20 Y.O. Release Video

All Nite (Don't Stop) Live

Velvet Rope Tour:Control Medley

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In light of the recent discussions about pornography and promiscuity I feel very pressed to weigh in on the discussion from a spiritual perspective. For the LGBT community there is great skepticism about the relevance of the Bible and its teaching on sex and sexuality. This debate is destroying individuals, families, local churches, and national denominations. Putting the debate aside I want to ask if there is relevant instruction for people about how we govern our bodies?

What does God say to the believer about our body and our relationship with Him? Ask yourself. Is my sexual expression a reflection of the plan and purpose of God for life? When God sees what I do privately is He pleased?

1 Corinthian 6:15 tells us that our bodies are members of Christ. Verses 19 and 20 go a little further and say “Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you and which ye have from God, and that ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's.

I want to encourage everyone who is reading this post. Your sexual desire does not have to be control force in your life. You do not have to allow the counterfeit images of pornography to be your dream and your fantasy. Promiscuity does not have to be your identity. The purpose of God for all of our lives goes far beyond sex. I speak to every gay, lesbian, bisexual and trans-gendered person reading this blog. I know messages of guilt and condemnation are what you have heard most often. But I say to you today that God wants to express Himself through you. He loves you and has a plan for your life. I know you have been hurt. I know you have been kicked. But the love of God is greater than every gay-basher. Look past every obstacle and see your savior, paying the price for you. I heard a preacher say, “Jesus was hung-up for my hang-ups.” Paul said it best in Galatians 2:20. “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.”


In the words of Jesus, our savior, as He hang dying on the Cross, IT IS FINISHED.

Love you

Email Albert: albertrlee@hotmail.com
Myspace

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20 comments | Saturday, May 12, 2007





Over the past few days it has been almost impossible to escape the controversy surrounding the men of Coco Dorm . We all thought the troubled Flavaworks company that produces the Coco Dorm series had cleaned up it's act after allegations of models participating in unsafe sex and charges of embezzlement at the hands of the company's CEO Phillip Bleicher . That was until a shocking news story appeared on NBC6 in Miami that stirred up the controversy all over again.

Black LGBT bloggers Bernard Tarver, Jasmyne Cannick , C. Baptiste Williams , Keith Boykin , and myself all covered the story on our blogs and almost immediately found ourselves in the middle of a war that threatened to divide our community.

Everyone seemed to have an opinion on this story, bloggers were typing away, message boards were being flooded with comments, the Coco Dorm staff even had Bernard Tarver's blog shutdown in an attempt to "keep the fire from turning into an inferno."

It seems all of the usual LGBT leaders had a response and those within the community were aggresively voicing their support of the models or their disgust with the entire operation. But no one had heard anything from Philip Bleicher or the men involved in this salacious scandal...until now.

Instead of continuing to be on the outside looking in I decided to go directly to the source. This morning I spent an hour talking to Coco Dorm manager and model Alex Flex. In my exclusive unedited interview Alex gets a chance to tell his side of the story, the side of the story he says was left out of the NBC6 broadcast that ushered this scandal back into the spotlight.

Listen to it for yourself and then draw your own conclusion. It's definitely an eye-opener! Click here to listen to the full interview.

*Pictures courtesy of Alex Flex
*Text on all photos by Alex Flex

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17 comments | Thursday, May 10, 2007



In the wake of the latest Coco Dorm controversy and a recent outing to see the sexually driven film Boy Culture (which is excellent by the way), I've been pondering over the widely held belief that all gay men are promiscuous. You've heard people say before that being gay is all about sex and that gay men cannot maintain long -lasting relationships. I've found myself in the middle of many heated debates on this topic and my belief is that all men regardless of their sexual orientation are built with a strong apetite for sex, and unlike most women they are capable of performing the act without being emotionally involved.

So to say that all gay men are promiscious is an unfair generalization. How many of us have straight male friends who are constantly competing to see how many women they've slept with; as if they're going to get a trophy for being in the triple digits? This behavior is not only condoned in many circles but it is considered an example of true masculinity.

I can only speak for myself, but the drought I've been going through the past couple of months alone proves this theory to be false. I personally respect myself enough not to share my body with complete strangers. I'm not professing to be an angel because God knows when I first landed in New York City in the late 90's I did some things I'm not proud of now. But when you know better you do better.

You would think that the reality of HIV/AIDS and it's impact on the world would be enough to curb the need for unprotected sex but that's not the case. People have been having sex since the beginning of time and 25 years after the start of the epidemic we're not slowing down. I believe that anyone who engages in sexual intercourse should be mature enough to use a condom and ask the important questions that could affect their health, and if they're unable to do those two things they shouldn't be having sex at all.

Much of the hype around gay promiscuity has been the platform of the religious right. They've used it to invoke fear and divide people who are uninformed, knowing they will accept anything from clergy as fact. So many of us are trained to accept what we're taught and not dare ask questions. Sounds like a form of brainwashing to me.

The belief that gay men are more promiscious than any other group is just ridiculous. Can we just tell the truth and say men are promiscious, it has nothing to do with their sexual preference. But why would we want to separate the two when it's become a recreational sport for some to demonize gay men?

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So ask me if I'm over the Coco Dorm mess? The answer is hell yes! I'm a special guest on fellow blogger Trent Jackson's Friday Finale. We discuss the latest allegations against Flava Works Entertainment and the "models" of Coco Dorm .

This will be the last time I will address this controversy, so head on over to In The Mix With Trent to hear what we have to say.

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Well it's about time. Management at the Atlanta club Sugarhill has issued an apology to the patrons who attended the Meshell Ndegeocello concert last weekend. If you remember last week I wrote about Meshell's unprofessional and disrespectful behavior towards her fans during her live show. I also recorded video footage of her opening number and was able to capture the singer as she passed out on stage. The video is dark due to to Meshell's request to have the stage lights turned off, but you can clearly see her security pick her up towards the end of the video. Check it out below.

21 comments | Wednesday, May 09, 2007



From jasymnecannick.com

Earlier this week I posted a blurb about fellow blogger Bernie Tarver’s blog on the Chicago Department of Public Health’s newly released report on the latest rate of syphilis and HIV infections.

Apparently, the report was a follow-up to an investigation they conducted into the unsafe sexual practices conducted by FlavaWorks, operators of the Internet website CocoDorm.com, where young gay Black and Latin men engage in sexual acts for the enjoyment of viewers who pay a membership fee to watch.

Well tonight in South Florida on NBC 6, reporter Jeff Burnside will discuss a house in a neighborhood that features Black and Latino men who have sex with men for money (Click here for the preview).

Also, since posting my initial blog on the Chicago Department of Public Heath’s report, the powers at be over at Flavaworks have begun to try and legally make me remove the information and from what I hear, they’re doing it to everyone who references the report and Flavaworks.

I know people, even here in Los Angeles, that throw sex parties for men. These parties are highly attended and often involve unsafe sex. The people that give these parties are very much involved in the community and do support financially, but at the same time I have issues with them because I know like they know that HIV and AIDS is still very much an issue for the Black gay male community.

When we look at HIV and AIDS in our community, we also have to look at the role that we play in it as well. These parties and the South Florida houses of the world, are just as much to blame in the spreading of HIV in our community as is the government’s lack of adequate funding for prevention efforts.

There’s a lot of money to be made in sex, and gay male sex at that. But what’s the cost? Our lives? And I am posing the question because like I said, I know people who thrown these types of parties here in Los Angeles and while I have never gone, friends of mine have and it bothers me because they’re playing Russian Roulette.

I suspect that like with the down low, the South Florida story tonight may spark a national discussion on the sexual practices of gay men, and we will be right smack dab in the middle of it. And like with the down low, it will get labeled as a Black thing, when we all know that bath houses from here to Japan, cater to white gay men among others.

UPDATE :

Since I posted the above story on the pending legal issues of Flavaworks Entertainment, I along with fellow bloggers Jasmyne Cannick, Bernie Tarver, and C. Baptiste Williams have become a target for attack by the staff at CocoDorm. At the time of my post I simply cut and pasted Jasmyne's commentary because I found it to be interesting and honestly dead on. I hadn't really formulated an opinion but I felt it was newsworthy and would definitely affect our community negatively at some point.

Let's get one thing straight. If the models at CocoDorm are having unsafe sex and the management is profiting off of this, the argument that it doesn't affect anyone else because the individuals are adults is bullshit! We are all aware that new HIV/AIDS infections are out of control in our community, and when a person is infected it not only affects the individual but the people who love them as well.

This is not about denying the staff at CocoDorm the right to run their porn business, but it's about holding people accountable for putting our Black brothers at risk. It's obvious that at the end of the day this entire operation is about money. I could care less about the "business" aspect of Coco Dorm, my concern is about the health of the models and the negative images that will be displayed over the next few days to the public that will cause a major backlash on our community.

We are constantly fighting to tell our stories and to have positive representation of our lives in the media and this is what my mother will get to see when she turns on the evening news. The men of Coco Dorm in no way represent what I stand for and I'm appauled that they've taken it upon themselves to attack those within the community who work to lift us up and not tear us down.

They've already threatened and failed to shut down Jasmyne and Bernie's blog, so I guess I'm next on the list to receive an e-mail or a phone call. I hope they know I'm not moved.

The saga continues here .

2 comments | Tuesday, May 08, 2007




I was recently sent an article that was printed in the New York Times that explored the existence of racism in the professional dance world, particularly in two major New York Ballet Companies, The New York City Ballet and The American Ballet Theater.

The piece entitled "Where Are The Balck Swans"? took issue with the lack of diversity in American ballet. Since The Dance Theater of Harlem went on hiatus in 2004 there has been a very small number of Black dancers who have been employed to dance with professional companies. And even if they're lucky enough to land a job, they usually never advance beyond the corps de ballet .

So why do these dancers continue to dance in the face of rejection? I'll tell you why, because they were born to do it. The truth is that they would do it for free. I always tell people who want to dance professionaly if there is anything else in life they would rather do then do it, this career is not for the faint of heart.

You would think that race would not be a factor in the dance community and that it would all boil down to what each dancer has to bring to the floor, but that's not the case. This problem doesn't just exist in the ballet world but in commercial dance and Broadway as well.

I'll never forget how often I noticed the color of my skin during my days as a dancer in New York City. It was common practice to count the number of Black dancers who were auditioning for the same job, because we knew there was only room for one or two. There's always a "token blackie" in every show, and while you don't want to be that person you also don't want to be unemployed.

There is no shortage of talented classically trained Black dancers, but there is a shortage of ballet masters and directors who are unwilling to shift their thinking and introduce audiences to an image of a new ballerina...a Black one.

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Chicago residents are up in arms over a billboard erected by Fetman, Garland & Associates, an all female law firm that specializes in divorce cases. The billboard simply says, "Life's short. Get a dvorce".
Attorney Corri Fetman, the brain child behind the billboard believes it provides hope for those who are in unhappy marriages.

But not everyone in Chicago or across America agrees with Attorney Fetman. Many people believe it is a "direct attack" on the sanctity of marriage( now where have I heard that before?) and further perpetuates the belief that marriage is outdated.

Well that's not what I thought when I saw the ad, but more on that later. Truth be told, 50% of marriages in this country end in divorce . My parents have been married for over 30 years, but they met during an era when people truly married for life and divorce was not an option. Even during infidelity and abuse a couple was expected to tough it out.

Attorney Corri Fetman told ABC News, "Law firm advertising is boring...everything's always the same. It's lawyers in libraries with a suit on and the law books behind them. They don't say anything. What , I should hire you because you have a law degree? C'mon. So we wanted to try something different."

Excuse me for a second while I look at this from a gay male perspective. I find it humorous that so many privileged heterosexuals are outraged about this billboard. It should be much harder for them to get married than it is to get a divorce.The heteros will say I do in a Britney Spears Las Vegas minute and the marriage will end in divorce just as fast. Maybe if they were denied the right to marry they would respect the institution more.

I could care less about the message this billboard sends, divorce isn't even on my radar, I'm still trying to win the right to get married. These lawyers have accomplished their goal, they're on every major network and newspaper and that kind of publicity is priceless.

3 comments | Monday, May 07, 2007






Timothy Daniels and Tadhi Coulter are a gay couple living in Los Angeles. Timothy has been living with HIV for over 20 years and his long time partner Tadhi is HIV negative. I had the pleasure of meeting these two extraodinary individuals during my time in L.A. where we all frequented In The Meantime Men's Group .

They are co-founders of the organizationStanding -NTruth and have made it their mission to educate, empower, and mobilize the Black community around HIV/AIDS. One of the organizations tools for educating the masses about the facts about HIV/AIDS and the stigma attatched to the disease is a documentary that goes by the same name(Standing -N-Truth).

Recently Timothy and Tadhi shared their story of being in a committed relationship, the rejection of certain family members, and dealing with Timothy's positive status on National Public Radio.

I've often said that it's imperative that we go out and tell our own stories or we risk having someone else tell them for us.This is exactly what Timothy has done. It takes an amazing amount of courage to stand up in front of a room filled with strangers and announce that you're gay and also HIV- positive.

I saw his documentary for the first time last September at a screening during Atlanta's Black Gay Pride Celebration and was deeply moved by how raw and uninhibited the stories were of the people involved in the film. HIV/AIDS is not the death sentence it once was, but the invention of life saving drugs should not cause us to become complacent. The fight to eradicate this terrible disease is far from over. Timothy and Tadhi along with their organization is a beautiful example of what can be accomplished when you choose love over fear and life over death.

Check out the documentary Standing- N-Truth below:

Standing -N- Truth:

Add to My Profile | More Videos

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5 comments | Sunday, May 06, 2007




To say that I was disappointed in the actions of neo-soul singer Meshell Ndegocello over the weekend during a performance in Atlanta would be a huge understatement. Over 500 people lined up in front of Sugarhill, a club venue at Atlanta's popular Underground to see the openly gay artist perform live, but what they were subjected too was an angry, disrespectful, and intoxicated Meshell.

I have to admit that I'm not a huge fan. I don't own any of her albums, but I was familiar with her music and enjoyed the few songs that were able to break into the mainstream during the late 90's. I've written in the past about how I was moved by her courage to record the controversial song Leviticus Faggot and it's impact on the lives of many young LGBT people.

But the ounce of respect I had for Meshell going into this concert was quickly diminished by the end of her 45 minute set.
She appeared on stage dressed in all black with a head wrap covering her locks. I didn't expect her to pull a Diana Ross and have 10 costume changes during her performance, but I also didn't expect her to look like the man on the corner with a mug that says "Got any spare change? ".

Five minutes into heavy instrumentals from her band and very few vocals from Meshell, the crowd gasps as we see Meshell passed out on the middle of the stage. Was she high? Or did the flash photography from the crowd cause her epilepsy to act up? The jury is still out on that one. But upon her return to the stage she threw water on the crowd, performed with her back to the audience at times, and left the stage twice provoking boos from her paying fans.

I'd been told to expect anything from a live Meshell Ndegeocello show, it all depends on what kind of mood she's in. Her opening act ( I couldn't even begint to tell you who he was) tricked us into believing that Meshell was going to have something profound to say about the state of today's music, but instead all we got was an expensive ticket for an amateur show by an artist who is obviously bitter about not achieving commercial success.

I know she and other neo-soul artists shun anything related to "Hollywood", for them it's all about the music and I agree it should be. But if going underground is going to turn you into a bitter and angry human being you might want to re-consider recording that radio-friendly pop song.

And never under any circumstances bite the hands that's putting money in your pocket. There were die hard fans in the audience who felt betrayed and disrespected. It's a shame when you meet someone you idolize and they turn out to be the exact opposite of who you imagined them to be. Whatever Meshell is going through I hope she comes out of it really soon, otherwise she's going to remain just another D-List artist.

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It was my intention to write a response to "ex-gay" Charlene Cothran's open letter to the Black LGBT community, but I'm still having a hard time wrapping my brain around the misguided and foul statements she wrote in this letter.

I bet you had no idea you were "sexually confused", "lonely and addicted to sex parties and pornography" ? If these are not characteristics you posess( because I know I don't) this is what Charlene believes and this is the message she's spreading about our community. And of course she's doing so under the disguise of Christian love.

"He is calling you. You've heard him while dancing at the club. You've heard him in the quiet of your home. Perhaps in the midst of doing what you've become sick of doing, you've heard Him calling you to come home. We're here to let you know that coming home is only a prayer away."

God bless her and the Exodus International boat she came in on. Read Charlene's letter here . To be continued...

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It has been a full three weeks since last I was able to share with you due to my travel and singing schedule. I return this week to build on the themes we’ve discussed thus far; Abundant Life, Our Identity in God, Reflecting the Resurrection in Our Daily, and God’s Undying Love for His Children.

Today we continue with this scripture: Galatians 6:7-9. Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting. And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

As a young child I heard my mother say to my brother while he was dealing with very serious legal trouble, “you reap what you sow.” I didn’t I understand at the time how far-reaching that piece of wisdom was. I didn’t understand that the seed that my mother was talking about and the seed that scripture talks about goes far beyond what a farmer puts into the ground. I would even suggest to you that it goes far beyond the conventional message that is prevalent in many churches today where seed usually refers to money.

The passage of scripture often quoted is 2 Corinthians 9:6-7. “He which soweth sparingly shall reap also sparingly; and he which soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully. Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.” I will not dispute that this particular passage is discussing monetary seed. I believe, however, that the passage in Galatians encompasses a much broader definition of what seed can be and how powerful it is in our daily life.

Those of you who have grown up in church know many preachers discuss sin in terms of thought, word, and deed. I have come to realize that those three elements can also be looked at as seed. Everything that our minds contemplate, every word that comes out of our mouths and everything we do is a seed that produces a harvest. For those of us who primarily sow to the flesh the scripture says that our harvest will be corruption. While this can be a challenging pill to swallow, we understand that everything on this earthly plane will one day pass away. What a waste it would be to spend all our time focused on the things that have no value in eternity. We all like nice things, but what should our priorities be. On the contrary, the scripture makes a bold statement that those who sow to the Spirit will reap life everlasting. If you remember my very first post, I told you that it was God’s absolute intention for his children to live abundantly. I also said that this abundance was not mere material abundance but it was also spiritual abundance.

This begs the question; how does one sow to the Spirit? There are two passages of scripture that I would like to share with you. The first deals with things that can be categorized as flesh and as Spirit. The second passage helps us to direct our thoughts in such a way to stay at peace in our minds. Galatians 5:19-23. Now the doings (practices) of the flesh are clear (obvious): they are immorality, impurity, indecency, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, anger (ill temper), selfishness, divisions (dissensions), party spirit (factions, sects with peculiar opinions, heresies), envy, drunkenness, carousing, and the like. I warn you beforehand, just as I did previously, that those who do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the [Holy] Spirit [the work which His presence within accomplishes] is love, joy (gladness), peace, patience (an even temper, forbearance), kindness, goodness (benevolence), faithfulness, gentleness (meekness, humility), self-control (self-restraint, continence). Against such things there is no law [that can bring a charge].

Philippians 4:8. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

If we examine our lives closely we can’t help but see ourselves in these passages (thank God for Grace and mercy). When scripture points out our shortcomings it is very easy to see the Bible as irrelevant and outdated. But if we judge our own life by the scripture we are presented with a wonderful opportunity for monumental spiritual growth and maturation.

Your thoughts, concerns, comments, and questions are always welcome. General comments can be left here on the site. Things of a more personal nature can be sent to me via email or Myspace.

The Lord bless you and keep you; The Lord make is face to shine upon you, and be gracious unto you; The Lord lift up His countenance upon you and give you peace.


Email Albert: albertrlee@hotmail.com
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